Sunday, March 13, 2016

Wedding traditions most practiced today

Every bride and groom wants their wedding day to be special and memorable. And many want it to stand out from the rest by doing something different or unique. But it gets harder and harder to find the new and different because word spreads fast. For instance, I remember the first time I had carrot wedding cake. What a delicious difference. That might have been twenty years ago. Now it is common place to have wedding cakes comprised of different flavors for each layer, or even wedding cupcakes. So the traditional wedding cake is gradually becoming an obsolete tradition.

Some wedding traditions have become so entrenched in culture that many times people look at them as rules to be followed. What you do with that will depend on whether you are one who abides by the rules or someone who believes rules are made to be broken. With that said, this post takes a look at the most-practiced wedding traditions today.

Father giving the bride away

According to a recent Harris Poll most people still think the father of the bride should give the bride away. However, people aren't so sure about sticking him with the bill for the wedding anymore.

Night before the wedding spent apart

The UK's four-star Hallmark Hotels also polled people in the UK regarding wedding traditions and 54 percent of them believe couples should spend the night before the wedding apart. In the U.S. we are even more traditional with 74 percent of us following this tradition.

Something old, new, borrowed, and blue

This tradition of the bride wearing something old, something new, something borrowed and something blue is a tradition that originates from an Old English rhyme but is still widely practiced today.

Adding these items to what the bride wears is among wedding traditions thought to bring good luck, but each item has its own meaning. The old represents continuity, the new signifies optimism, the borrowed item stands for happiness, and the blue symbolizes love, purity, and fidelity.

Throwing the Bouquet

Throwing the bridal bouquet is another popular tradition which stems from a time when other women tried to rip pieces of the bride's dress and flowers to steal some of her good luck for themselves. Back then, the bride tossed her flowers into the air in order to make her get away while the guests were distracted. Today, the belief tied to this practice has morphed into whoever catches it will be the next to be married.

In my next blog we'll take a look at new practices that are quickly becoming traditions in their own rite.

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Related article: Wedding Traditions Origins: Newer Wedding Trends and Traditions

Photo credits: John Mayer, Timothy Marsee

Sunday, January 17, 2016

Why brides carried a bouquet

We've seen the surprising origins of many wedding traditions on this site, and the origins of the bridal bouquet is no different. This is another ancient tradition that can be traced back to Rome. At that time, brides carried or wore flower garlands because they believed flowers signified new beginnings, fidelity and hope of fertility.

Original purposes of the bridal bouquet

Like many wedding traditions, the origin of the bridal bouquet tradition can be traced back to ancient Rome. For them, like I said, it signified new beginnings, fidelity and hope of fertility. By the Middle Ages bouquets of strong-smelling herbs and spices were carried by the bride for their magical effects to ward off evil spirits, bad luck, and sickness.

Today, the bouquet represents happiness and satisfaction in marriage and the wedding flowers making up the bouquet are thought to have their own special meanings.

In the Middle Ages, the wedding bouquet also became a way to distract female guests who were eager to tear off a piece of the wedding dress for good luck. The bride tossed the flowers to the wedding guests who believed it would be be a talisman for good luck for the one who caught it. And so why while they were distracted as they scrambled to get their hands on the bouquet, the bride ran away with her dress in one piece. Tossing the bouquet is a tradition that is still practiced today!

Vintage wedding bouquet ideas for the modern bride

Consider wearing a flower garland like the ancient Romans who believed flowers signified new beginnings, fidelity and hope of fertility.
Make up a bouquet of your favorite wild flowers, herbs and aromatic spices.

I'd love to hear from you. If you have a wedding story, a tradition you'd like me to blog about, a question, or have something to say, feel free to contact me. And if you enjoy reading my blog, click "follow" and you'll be notified when a new post is added to this blog. Thanks for reading.

Photo credits: wikimedia, Victorian Magazine, wikimedia, wikimedia, widimedia

Sunday, December 6, 2015

History of the marriage contracts

While stories of star-struck lovers getting married make for good tales, historically marriage had little to do with love. In ancient times, marriage was more like a business deal. According to Stephanie Coontz, the author of Marriage, a History: How Love Conquered Marriage, "It was a way of getting in-laws, of making alliances and expanding the family labor force."

First recorded marriage contracts

Marriage is an ancient institution with the first recorded evidence of marriage contracts and ceremonies dating back 4,000 years in Mesopotamia. It was an institution that primarily regulated property rights and political privileges and contracts reflected that. In that ancient world marriage primarily served to preserve power.

Kings and others of the ruling class married off daughters to build alliances, acquire land, and produce legitimate heirs. These deals were basically business mergers, the forging of military coalitions, or the finalizing of peace treaties. It was seen as a way to build strategic alliances between families. Those getting married often had no say in the matter even in marriages between the lower class. In those cases, the purpose of marriage was to choose a marriage partner with a good work ethic, strength, skills and robust health – and to produce heirs. If they had adjoining plots of land that was a real bonus.

What is traditional marriage? This book may open your eyes.

Marriage played role banks and markets fill today

For most of history love played no part in marriage because it was considered too serious a matter to be based on such a frail emotion. In ancient Mesopotamia arranged marriages were the standard. Often the bride and groom had never even met. In some cases, bridal auctions were held and women were sold to the highest bidder. Economically, marriage filled the role that banks and markets do today. It organized and transferred property and gave individuals access to new workers for the family business.

This is also where the dowry came into play. Until the late eighteenth century, the marriage dowry was the largest amount of cash or movable goods a man would acquire in his lifetime. As a result, men were often more interested in the dowry than the bride.

The "widow's third" was a part of the marriage contract that guaranteed European women that upon their husband's death she would be provided for.

Babylonian Bridal Auction

I'm not saying love was never part of marriage in ancient times, it just wasn't the norm and was definitely not necessary. Until the late 18^th century, parents had the right to arrange their children's marriages and could dissolve a marriage if it happened without their permission.

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Photo credits: wikipedia, amazon, wikipedia

Tuesday, November 24, 2015

Jumping the broom tradition

Jumping the broom is an historical ritual with Celtic roots. Like many traditions, exactly how and where it started is brought into question. Some say it started with the Romani Gypsy people living in Wales and others say it originated with the Welsh people themselves. Today variations of this ritual are practiced by Welsh, Celtics and Druids as well as the nomadic Romani. In fact, the earliest mention of this tradition is tied to the Romani and dates back to the 18th century. Today, common-law broomstick weddings are still practiced in some parts of Wales as a centuries-old custom called priodas coes ysgub.

Along with this heritage, some say jumping the broom comes from an African marriage ritual which was practiced in the U.S. during the days of slavery when blacks weren't allowed to marry. However, others attribute this as a practice taken from the whites. Either way, secret ceremonies were held as black couples committed themselves to each other by stepping over a broomstick in front of family and friends.

Now the tradition is practiced as a folk tradition in various parts of the world from Eastern Europe to the Americas.

Besom broom used for broom jumping

The type of broom used in these ceremonies was besom brooms constructed by tying twigs or straw together against a strong rod or stick. Back in the 18th century, brooms were found just inside the door to every home with bristles up to ward off evil spirits and to protect the home and all who lived there. Sometimes it was hung over the door with the bristles facing opening of the door for good luck. It was considered one of the first lines of defense for the homemaker.

Today, jumping the broom is thought to represent the couple entering a new life together, and sweeping away their single lives including former problems and concerns.

4 jumping the broom variations

While we can dispute where and how jumping the broom started, I'd rather focus on variations of the practice as wedding planners have started to include the custom today. Jumping the broom can take place at the church, the reception, the couples' new home, and is often included in neo-pagan unions, too.

Place the broom at an angle by the rear door of the church.
Groom jumps first, followed by the bride.
Broom laid on floor and couple jumps over it hand-in-hand as high as they can.
Broom laid in the entryway to the new home with bride and groom taking turns jumping over it. (Another variation of this one is for the groom to carry his bride over the broom into their new home.)

Another old custom involves the couple jumping over a crossed broom and sword held by the best man and the maid of honor. This practice represents cutting of ties to parents and the ties being swept away as the couple crosses a new threshold to start a new life together.

Today couples jumping the broom often design their own broom and decorate them to complement wedding colors, or they can be purchased already-decorated.

Tajiri 36" Jump Broom for Wedding

Some who want to eliminate the broom because of its Wiccan associations may choose to step over a sword instead of a broom.

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Photo credits: wikipedia, Wikimedia, wikimedia, Amazon

Tuesday, November 3, 2015

German bridal cup tradition

The legend of the Nurnberg Bridal Cup is centuries old. It is said to have started in Nurnberg, Germany, where a wealthy nobleman lived with his daughter, the Mistress Kunigunde. She fell in love with a young goldsmith who was an ambitious sort. The wealthy nobleman didn't approve of the relationship and he and his daughter were at odds, for her heart was set on the goldsmith and no other for her husband. As a result, one by one she refused many rich suitors who asked for her hand in marriage.

The daughter's behavior enraged her father and so he had the young goldsmith thrown into the darkest dungeon. His daughter cried and cried, but he would not be swayed by her tears. To the nobleman's dismay, imprisoning the young goldsmith in the dark dungeon did not stay her love for the young man. Her broken heart started to show in her pale pallor which grew worse day by day.

Finally, at his wits end, the nobleman reluctantly came up with a proposal. He said, "If your goldsmith can make a chalice from which two people can drink at the same time without spilling a single drop, I will free him and you shall become his bride."

Handcrafted bridal cups can still be purchased today.

Of course when he thought up the challenge, he thought it an impossible task, but the young goldsmith was motivated by love. He mustered all his skill and crafted a masterpiece. He sculpted a young maiden with a smile as beautiful as that of Mistress Kunigunde. The skirt worn by this damsel was hollow and served as one cup. The second was a bucket which the girl carried over head with extended arms. It was crafted to swivel and so two people could drink from the cup without spilling a drop.

The goldsmith met the challenge. He and the nobleman's daughter were joined in marriage and were said to drink from the romantic bridal cup. Today the bridal cup remains a prized wedding tradition with the cup a symbol of good luck, love and faithfulness.

Drinking from a German wedding cup

Drinking from a German wedding cup takes some practice but makes a great photo opt. If you try it, but are unsure you want to navigate drinking from a German bridal cup, but like the idea of adding a special cup to your wedding or reception, the Scottish quaich is easier to drink from and offers another rich history that can make your day a little more special.

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Photo credits: wikimedia, Amazon

Sunday, October 25, 2015

History of flower girls

Today, flower girls are a pretty standard (but precious) part of most wedding parties. Some brides choose to have one flower girl, while others may have several. They are an adorable wedding tradition, but have you ever wondered about the history of flower girls? Like many wedding traditions the origins are not 100 percent certain. Some sources say the origin of flower girls goes back centuries to Ancient Rome while others suggest the tradition got its start in Britain.

Ancient Rome flower girls didn't carry flowers

The tie to ancient Rome goes back to young attendants who carried sheaves of wheat and herbs to ensure blessings of prosperity and fertility to the married couple. By the Medieval times, it was bouquets of garlic which were believed to ward off evil spirits.

Elizabethan Era flower girls

It was during the Elizabethan Era that the tradition of scattering flower petals came into practice. At that time, brides followed a path of petals from their house to the church. To create this path, flower girls followed musicians in a wedding procession and carried a gold-plated rosemary branch and a silver cup adorned with ribbons and filled with flower petals and rosemary sprigs. This cup was known as the bride's cup, and the petals were considered a symbol of fertility and thought to give the couple good luck.

Victorian Era flower girls

In the Victorian era flower girls looked more like the flower girls of today. They were young and innocent and dressed in a simple white dress which was sometimes adorned with a colored sash made of satin or silk. She carried a gorgeously decorated basket filled fresh blooms or wore a floral hoop on her head. The circular shape of the hoop was symbolic of true love which has no end -- the same meaning bestowed on wedding rings.

In Western Europe, the tradition of including children as attendants in weddings also included a ring bearer and often included other attendants in the wedding party, too. Many royal and society weddings still follow this tradition today with two or more flower girls.

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Photo credits: pixabay, wikimedia, Randy Robertson, wikimedia

Friday, October 9, 2015

History of wedding cake toppers

If I say wedding cake topper, what do you picture? It might be a miniature bride and groom, wedding bells or some other similar ornamentation with a wedding theme. While the history of wedding cakes dates back to the Roman Empire, it was nothing like wedding cakes as we know them today. Instead they were unsweetened loaves of bread which were crumbled over the bride for good luck. And wedding cake toppers as we know them haven't been around all that long either. They became a growing trend with middle class and affluent American families before the American Civil War. By the 1890s, they were quite common.

Those original wedding cake toppers weren't anything extravagant. Cakes were decorated with things like flowers, bells, or other small objects related to the bride and groom. Often these toppers were handmade by a family member or a professional wedding cake baker using frosting, icing, or non-edible materials like plaster of Paris.

Wedding cake toppers popular after World War I

Decorative cake toppers grew more popular after World War I. It was in the Roaring 20s that High Society in the U.S. adopted the custom of using figurines of the bride and groom atop the wedding cake. Popularity of this tradition grew quickly after Emily Post, American etiquette expert, mentioned them in her 1922 best seller that said, "wedding cake is an essential of every wedding reception," and went on to comment on the placement of the bride and groom figurines in the description of a beautifully decorated cake. In the early 1900s wedding cake toppers were made from glass, paper, or wood until they started being commercially made.

First commercially made wedding cake toppers

Along with this, American retailers like Sears & Roebuck started to market and sell cake toppers showcasing a bride and groom. By 1924 you could find an assortment of two-inch tall bride and groom toppers made from wax and featuring differences like groom without a hat or wearing a top hat. The bride could be purchased without a veil or wearing a cloth veil. By 1927, the Sears catalog had an entire page devoted to wedding cake ornaments.

With their growing popularity, wedding cake toppers started to be mass produced commercially in the U.S., Europe and Asia. They were available in the usual bride and groom side-by-side pose along with a selection of alternative poses. And during or following the War, the groom was sometimes depicted wearing a military uniform. Along with this, groom figurines could also be purchased a wearing police or fireman uniform, too.

Sparkling Love Cake Topper

Aside from bride and groom figurines, today we have toppers like cupids, hearts, love birds and sometimes even a framed picture of the couple. The tradition of adding a decorative ornament topper to the wedding cake has been joined with the tradition of removing and saving the memento as well as freezing the top layer of the cake to be eaten by the bride and groom on their first anniversary.

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