Sparta’s Unique Marriage Traditions

When people think of ancient Sparta, images of warriors, strict discipline, and military training usually come to mind. But what about the women? Specifically, the brides of Sparta? Marriage in ancient Sparta was unlike that in any other part of Greece, and the role of a Spartan bride offers fascinating insights into the values and priorities of this unique society.

 

Brides in Sparta Married Later

In contrast to Athenian girls, who often married as young as 12, Spartan brides typically married in their late teens or early twenties. This was intentional. Spartans believed that healthy, physically mature women would produce stronger, healthier children, especially the warriors Sparta depended on for survival.

From childhood, Spartan girls trained physically alongside boys. They ran, wrestled, danced, and competed, building strong bodies and confidence. This training prepared them not only for motherhood but also for the respected role they would hold in society.

 

 

The Unusual Wedding Ritual

Spartan marriage customs were strikingly different from the rest of Greece. Ancient Spartan weddings involved a ritualized "abduction." With her family’s consent, the bride would be taken away by her groom. Before their first night together, her hair was cut short, and she was dressed in men’s clothing or a simple cloak. She would wait in a darkened room, and her husband, who continued to live in the communal military barracks until age 30 would visit her in secret.

This ritual symbolized her transition from maidenhood to wife. It also reflected the Spartan emphasis on discipline, simplicity, and symbolic transformation.

 

Life as a Spartan Bride and Wife

Becoming a bride in Sparta meant gaining significant independence compared to women in other Greek city-states:

• Household Authority: With men constantly engaged in military life, Spartan wives managed households, estates, and finances.
• Land Ownership: Women could own and inherit property, and by some accounts, Spartan women controlled nearly half the land at certain points in history.
• Respected Role: A Spartan bride’s primary responsibility was to bear strong children, but she was also expected to speak her mind and uphold Spartan values. Unlike the secluded wives of Athens, Spartan women were visible and influential.

 

The Legacy of Spartan Brides

Spartan brides symbolized the society’s priorities: strength, discipline, and service to the state. They were not passive figures but respected participants in the communal life of Sparta. Ancient writers often commented on their confidence and boldness, sometimes with admiration, sometimes with criticism. In Sayings of Spartan Women, Plutarch includes several instances of their frankness, known as parrhēsia. While sometimes presented positively, he also expresses unease when women speak on matters seen as outside their domain.

Ultimately, to be a Spartan bride was to step into a role that carried both duty and power. In a society built on warriors, the women who raised them were central to Sparta’s identity and survival.

Photo Credits: picryl 

 

History of black wedding dresses

While most of us in the West tend to think of the black wedding dress as something new, a gothic fashion statement, or a way to buck tradition, the black wedding dress has a rich cultural history. Its origins can be traced back 3,000 years ago to the Zhou Dynasty in China. In the West, black lace wedding dresses were traditional for Roman Catholic brides in Spain and many brides in the West wore black because it was a color that didn’t show stains and the dress could be worn following the wedding as their good dress. 

Black wedding dress in Chinese history

During the Zhou dynasty(1046BC——256BC), wedding dresses worn by Chinese brides were modest, solemn, black, and worn over light red underwear. The bride’s hair was worn up and held in place with a band and hairpin.

 

Today in China, wedding dresses differ by region. Northern Chinese traditional brides most often wear a dress that is mostly red and decorated with elaborate gold and silver designs. In Southern China, traditional brides prefer a two-piece red dress ornately decorated with a gold dragon and phoenix. Modern couples have stepped away from these traditional dresses to a more simplified wedding dress.

Spanish brides wore black

In Spain, Roman Catholic brides wore black, historically, too. The custom outfitted the bride in a black lace gown, with a black lace veil (mantilla) draped over her head and shoulders. This veil symbolized her vow to love her husband until death. 

 

History of the black wedding dress in the West

White wedding gowns became popular in the Victorian era, following Queen Victoria’s wedding. Before the white dress, most brides in Western Europe wore a variety of colors, but black wedding dresses were a popular choice. Not because it was the most fashionable, but because they were most practical. Wedding dresses were expensive and most women couldn’t afford a special dress to where one time. Instead, they selected a black dress because the dark color didn’t show stains, and the dress could be worn following the wedding.

 Available on Amazon

 

Today, some brides who choose to wear black think they are bucking tradition, and while they are, they are also returning to tradition. As the saying goes, there’s nothing new under the sun.

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Photo credits: Photo by Murat IŞIK Photo by Bormann Chen

 

Origins of Scottish wedding blackening tradition

The Scottish pre-wedding ritual known as blackening practiced in the Highlands, Islands and rural parts of Scotland is a strange wedding tradition. In my book, it is disgusting. The groom and/or bride are publicly taken out and drenched with a wide array of ingredients like slop, molasses, flour, feathers, as well as smelly disgusting things like fish guts and cow dung. I’ve read that this practice as it is done today is actually a corrupted variation of an old foot washing/hair washing tradition when the purpose of the blackening was to ensure the groom was dirty before the washing. How could today's blackening tradition be related to foot washing?

 

Blackening foot washing

I did some digging and found answers in “A Highland Wedding in Bygone Days” published in The Celtic Magazine, Vol. 13., 1888. The origins of the blackening tradition can be traced to a foot washing custom. In this case, the foot washing took place the night before the wedding and involved the groom. He and his friends gathered at his house using the guise of washing his feet for his wedding. Just like many bachelor parties today, a good deal of practical joking took place. One of these jokes included using soot, dirt, and other blackening agents mixed with the water and rubbed on the feet and even on the face of the bridegroom.

If the groom was fortunate enough to escape, his friends chased him down, and if he was lucky enough to find a good hiding place and eluded them, it was considered a good omen of future prosperity. When his friends gave up looking for him, he spent the rest of the night dancing.

Wedding shoes custom

On the Monday night after the first public announcement of their impending marriage the young couple secretly visited the shoemaker for the marriage shoes. The groom paid for both pairs. (In Greece it is still tradition for the groom to buy the bride’s shoes). They were delivered the morning of the wedding with money tucked inside, and if the groom delivered the shoes himself, he took the time to put them on her feet. However, it was perfectly acceptable for someone else to deliver the shoes. 

As for the money in the shoes, this differs from the longstanding tradition of placing a lucky Sixpence in the bride’s shoe because that is done by the bride’s father as a symbol of prosperity, love and unity. However, there is another Scottish wedding tradition in which the groom popped a silver coin under his left foot. I don’t have any more info on what money the groom slipped into her shoe or why, but if I learn more, I’ll be sure to update this section.

Other Scottish wedding superstitions

As long as we are looking back at the history of Scottish wedding traditions/superstitions, here are a few lesser-known wedding superstitions once practiced in Scotland:

• Unlucky to get married in May

• Tuesdays and Thursdays were favored for weddings because the rest of the days were thought to be unlucky.

• A day during the waxing moon was always preferred.

• When the bride entered her new house for the first time she had to be careful to step over the threshold if she would be lucky.

• A cake of bread and a cheese, both of which had been previously either broken or cut into pieces, were placed on a plate and thrown over the bride’s had as she entered the door. If the plate broke it was a good omen as to having a son as heir. 

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Photo credits: Leanne Townsend