About Wedding Traditions & Meanings

Monday, May 16, 2022

7 traditional wedding garter fun facts

The garter toss is a popular Western wedding tradition. This ritual can be traced back to the Medieval ages, but before we delve into the fun facts of wedding garter history let me explain how this tradition works today. 

 

traditional wedding garter

How the garter toss works today

The garter toss is considered a lighthearted tradition that takes place during the wedding reception. Most often, the bride is seated on a chair while all the guests circle around. The bachelors within the group congregate in one area. The groom then removes the garter. How this is done varies these days, but most often the husband removes the garter from the bride’s leg (usually worn just above the knee), with his hands. Once he has it in his hands, the groom turns his back and tosses it over his head to the group of bachelors. Think of it as a counterpart to the bouquet toss to the single women. Some people even have the woman who catches the bouquet dance the next dance with the bachelor who catches the garter. This leads to the question, where did this tradition come from?


7 traditional wedding garter fun facts

  1. The garter toss started in England and France where guests tried to take a piece of the bride's dress for good luck.
  2. Zealous guests often followed the couple from the reception to their marital bed, ripping at their clothes for a tatter of good luck.
  3. To appease the eager guests and give the bride a break from the nerve-racking experience of people tearing bits form her wedding dress practice grooms started to toss out a piece of the bride's wedding attire. This was the inspiration behind the garter toss and bouquet toss. It started with the toss of the garters that held up the bride’s stockings up.
  4. The garter toss was used as a distraction so the newlyweds could make a quick escape from the wedding reception as everyone scrambled to get their hands on the good luck charm.
  5. Today the wedding garter symbolizes good luck to the bachelors in attendance.
  6. Superstition attached to the garter is that whoever catches it will be next to get married.
  7. Today the garter toss is a way to gather all of the unmarried men to the dance floor.

 Garter toss not for everyone

While this is a popular wedding tradition that’s meant to be lighthearted in today’s Western culture, it is not for everyone. Some consider the long-standing tradition to be raunchy or at least awkward. Like any tradition, if you feel this way, feel free to skip it entirely.


Wednesday, April 6, 2022

Ancient skincare secrets

The biblical story of Esther is about a woman chosen as a candidate to become queen to the Persian king after he deposed his first wife. As Esther waited her turn to see the king, she had help getting ready. While I can’t say for sure, tradition puts Esther at 40 years old at the time. In some ways, with many women involved, it was a beauty contest and the preparation took a year. First, Esther used myrrh for six months as part of her beauty treatments. Used topically, myrrh oil helps fade blemishes, reduces symptoms of eczema and other skin ailments, and effectively cleans, moisturizes, and tightens the skin. It is also said to bring emotional balance. Esther's myrrh routine was followed by six months of other beauty treatments.

 

Ancient Skincare Secrets

Ancient skin care secrets

So what else can we learn from ancient cultures regarding skin treatments before the wedding day arrives? When it comes to ancient times and beauty, I couldn’t help but think of Cleopatra’s life. Maintaining beauty was a life-long endeavor for her. Many of the things she used were not available to common folk at the time but some are still available to us today.

milk bath

Milk baths: Cleopatra was renowned for her milk baths which kept her skin soft and beautiful. Even if you’ve heard about her milk baths, you might not know that the milk was not cow’s milk. It wasn’t even goat or sheep milk. It was donkey’s milk. Soured donkey’s milk. I know you might be scrunching your nose at this, but donkey’s milk was the beverage of the rich and widely accepted as the best substitute for infants when breastmilk wasn't available. The soured milk provided an extra benefit for her skin because when soured, the lactose in the milk converted to lactic acid.  When alpha hydroxy acids, like lactic acid, are applied to the skin it works kind of like a mild chemical peel. The surface layer of dead skin cells is eaten away, leaving new smoother blemish-free skin. Other ingredients added to her bath included:

Honey: Honey helps open the pores to clear away dirt, gently exfoliates, lightens scars, fights acne, deeply moisturizes.

Lavender and rose petals: While this was probably added for fragrance, it is interesting to note that lavender oil heals skin conditions. Its anti-inflammatory, antifungal, and detoxifying benefits, helps diminish redness, soothes and calms the skin and rapidly heal minor cuts and scrapes, as well as any rashes.

A modern-day option to replace a milk bath is the use of plain Greek yogurt. It offers the same mild exfoliating action that removes dry skin and leave’s skin feeling refreshed and comfortable.

Egyptian Magic: Honey, Beeswax, Olive Oil, 

Royal Jelly, Bee Pollen and Bee Propolis.

 

Royal jelly: (This one is also from Cleopatra’s beauty secrets). Royal jelly is secreted by bees feeding the queen bee. As a cosmetic, it was used in her head-to-toe beauty treatments. Today it is a popular ingredient in skin care products, and research supports its use as a collagen enhancer. The same acid in royal jelly that boosts collagen production also suppresses skin pigmentation and can brighten dark spots. It not only nourishes the skin with vitamins and minerals, it also helps to protect against the effects of ultraviolet radiation.

Dead Sea minerals: Many Dead Sea products, including salts and water were imported to Rome for their unique medicinal use. The heavy mineral concentration offers more than 21 different minerals thought to help with skin problems like eczema and psoriasis. The clay from the Dead Sea also has high levels of calcium, magnesium, bromide, potassium and sulfate which get absorbed into the skin directly, nourishing and revitalizing it.

Other essential beauty secrets of ancient past: Almond, moringa, and castor oils. These full body skin treatments kept skin soft, with less wrinkles, and helped fight the side effects of excessive exposure to the sun.

Today, if you are working on your pre-bridal skin care at home, take a lesson from the past. Start early and be consistent to see the best results. Remember, Esther’s beauty treatments took 12 months. 

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Sunday, March 13, 2022

5 popular Irish wedding traditions

 

Irish weddings are traditionally a time of celebrating family and friendships from around the world. It is a time of drinking, singing, laughing, and a hearty amount of partying. Amid the celebration, you'll find rich symbolism and a healthy dose of superstition. For this post we take a look at five popular Irish wedding traditions.

 


Irish wedding ring

 

Claddagh ring: The Irish Claddagh ring (pronounced “klahda”) is the traditional Irish wedding ring and also doubles as an engagement ring. Its distinguishing design offers unique symbolism and meaning that means different things depending on how you wear it. Each feature of the ring adds to its meaning: two hands (represent friendship) clasping a heart (symbolizing love) and usually topped by a crown (loyalty). While the meaning is clear, the origins of the Claddagh ring are shrouded among several legends.

 

Irish wedding band: Celtic knot wedding bands are the most popular design for Irish wedding bands because Celtic knot designs are crafted with a single thread that has no beginning or end. They symbolize the interconnection of life and eternity. On a wedding band, these loops are said to represent: eternal loyalty, faith, friendship, or love.



Handfasting

Before the church became involved in weddings, the handfasting ceremony was common in Ireland. It became the way couples were "officially" married. Today, this tradition is commonly used by couples for their unity ceremony, and the meaning of colors for handfasting cords adds another layer of symbolism and meaning to the couple’s special day.

 

 

Traditional Irish wedding toast

 

As far as wording goes, there isn’t one historic Irish wedding toast to fall back on. But the tradition of the Irish wedding toast does have a few idiosyncrasies to follow. Number one, the toast is to honor the couple. Even if the toast is funny, it should not put the bride and/or groom down. Secondly, it is common practice to use an Irish blessing, prayer, or proverb. For ideas, check out the Complete Guide to Irish Blessings.



 

Irish wedding bell tradition

The Irish wedding bell tradition started with the family giving the bride and groom a set of bells after they recited their vows. The couple rang the bells to ward off evil spirits and brought the bells home where they served as a reminder of the vows they made on their wedding day. Today, the Irish wedding bell is a popular wedding gift for Irish couples. It is to be kept in a prominent place in the home and when the couple argues they ring the bell to remind them of their wedding vows. If the dispute can’t be settled cordially, the bell is rung a little louder. This is supposed to purify and dispel stimulated emotions and change the perspective of the couple. This sounding of the bell also signals the end of the argument, even if neither the husband nor wife has ceded. It serves as a time out of sorts and allows the couple to cool down. For this reason, it is also known as the Irish make up bell.

 

The lucky Irish horseshoe

The horseshoe happens to be another Irish wedding icon. The shoes were traditionally given to the bride, most often by children following her wedding ceremony. She tied them to her bouquet and placed the whole lot next to the wedding cake during the wedding breakfast. I also read that the Celts sewed a horseshoe into the hem of the wedding dress for good luck. (This not only brought luck but also helped the dress hang properly). Have you ever wondered why a horseshoe was considered good luck in the first place? According to folk belief, iron held magical significance for the numerous Celtic tribes, and they thought it a lucky metal. Besides good luck, the Irish also believed the horseshoe to be a symbol of fertility. Following the wedding, the couple hung the horseshoe in their home, in the upright position like the letter ‘U’. This way luck gathered inside the U. (It’s worth noting that other societies believe the horseshoe should be hung upside-down to allow the luck to spill out on those who walk beneath it.

 

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Tuesday, March 1, 2022

Origins of the Handfasting Ceremony

Thinking of adding the symbolism of the handfasting ceremony to your wedding and would like to know more about it? As I delved into the history, I found many variations of this tradition, but the deeper I looked, the more I realized that much of what I thought I knew was, in fact, romanticized versions of handfasting “history.” For this post, first, I’ll include the embellished stories, and then for those interested in a more accurate account, I’ll offer that too.

Divinity Braid Celtic Knot Clover Green Theme Wedding Handfasting Cord


Celtic handfasting

In ancient times, pagan worship included handfasting ceremonies and weddings. When the Celts migrated from Europe and settled in Britain around 7000 BC, they brought the ritual with them, and the practice continued well through the Tudor Period. 


Back then, handfasting wasn’t part of the wedding but took place a year and a day before the wedding. It represented a couple’s commitment to each other, as well as the intent to get married. The couple agreed to live in a binding relationship as a trial marriage for a year and a day. During this trial run, the couple learned whether or not they could survive married life together. When the time was up the couple either broke up or chose to marry permanently. This handfasting ceremony was performed in the presence of an upstanding member of the community like the local vicar, constable, or a wealthy landowner.


Handfasting in the British Isles

Handfasting was a custom practiced in the British Isles where it could be weeks or months before a clergyman stopped by rural villages. Here, handfasting was the equivalent to a common-law marriage of today. The bride and groom just clasped hands and professed themselves, husband and wife. Most of the time this was performed before witnesses and was referred to as an irregular marriage. As long as the bride and groom had reached the age of consent (12 for brides, 14 for grooms) and were not too closely related, irregular marriages were as valid as regular marriages. There were three types of irregular marriages:

  1. Public declaration by the couple that they were husband and wife, followed by the consummation of the relationship
  2. Mutual agreement
  3. Living together and being recognized as husband and wife.

 


Christian handfasting ceremony

The influence of Christianity in the 16th century changed things up when it came to weddings. Many Protestant countries required a priest or minister for a marriage to be valid. In 1563 the Council of Trent did the same for the Roman Catholics. Marriage in the church became known as a regular marriage (valid marriage). The handfasting ceremony was performed by a clergyman and considered binding and legal in every way.


Where did the handfasting ritual come from?

It turns out that the origins of the handfasting ritual are found in Southern Scotland and Northern England Germanic. Their wedding customs succeeded Roman rites and consisted of two parts. First, the betrothal ceremony, followed by the giving away ceremony. The betrothal ceremony included a wedding contract where both sides agreed on terms. Once agreed upon, the contract was sealed with a handshake (clasping of hands--like all contracts were back then). The Anglo-Saxon term for this was “Handfæstung.” Similar terms are found in other Germanic languages. Over time, betrothals in Scotland and England became known as handfasting.

In the 1600s, after churches became involved, the wedding ceremony still took place outside the church. Some churches had a “marriage porch” for this purpose. Once the couple announced their consent before witnesses, including the priest, they clasped hands and kissed. Then all the people moved inside for the celebration of the Mass. (If the couple didn’t regularly attend church, they could wait and go to Mass the following Sunday, but this was not legally required.)

As for the idea of the year and a day trial marriage. It turns out that comes from modern romantic novels, and the concept was picked up by non-fiction writers (like me!) So handfasting with ribbons and cords wasn’t an ancient Celtic custom or even an ancient Scots custom. It turns out the handfasting ceremony we have today arose from a mix of old Germanic traditions (after conversion to Christianity), the romanticized concepts of modern writers like Sir Walter Scott, and old Scottish irregular marriages.

Meaning of handfasting today

With all this said, I still love the idea of the handfasting ceremony as we know it today. It still represents love and fidelity. Now that you know where it comes from, you can feel free to adopt it and make it your own. If you wonder where to start, check out the meaning of colors for handfasting cords. It can add another level of meaning between the bride and groom on their special day.

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Some links in this post are affiliate links. We are a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for us to earn fees by linking to amazon.com and affiliate sites.

 

Photo credit: Amazon, Amazon




Monday, February 7, 2022

How we mirror Ancient Egyptian wedding ring traditions

When looking into the history of wedding traditions, it is surprising how many of them can trace back to ancient Egypt. The wearing of wedding rings, for example, was recorded within 6000-year-old Egyptian papyrus rolls. These first wedding rings were crafted from braided hemp or reeds and worn as a marital status symbol. The husband placed the ring on his wife’s finger, a custom which entrusted and entitled them both to each other. Over time, this practice evolved to include more durable rings crafted of leather, bone, or ivory, and eventually, they advanced enough to work with various precious gemstones and metals such as gold.

 

 

Ancient Egyptian wedding ring beliefs

 

Ancient Egyptian pharaohs considered the circle to be a symbol of eternity because it had no beginning or end, and with this in mind, the wedding ring served to signify the perpetual love of the spouses. These beliefs are still held by many today, but one belief the ancients held that we haven’t adopted is the belief that the opening in the ring denoted a gateway to the unknown.

 

The custom of wearing the wedding ring on the fourth finger of the left hand also originated in this culture because the ancient Egyptians believed a special vein, the vena amoris (vein of love) ran from this finger directly to the heart. The ancient Romans adopted this belief and wore wedding rings on the same finger. While this belief isn’t anatomically correct, today in the West, we still call this finger the “ring finger.”

 


Passing on the wedding ring tradition

 

One of the oldest ring symbols in the world is the Egyptian ouroboros ring. It portrays a serpent swallowing its tail creating the eternal cycle of things. The word ouroboros means “tail devourer” in Greek. 

 


Later history includes ornamental finger rings worn by wealthy Egyptian women. This included the famed scarab design. Rings became more common, and by the Middle Kingdom grew more complex. Over time Greek and Roman rings styles supplanted Egyptian styles during the Ptolemaic dynasty. 

 

When Alexander the Great conquered the Egyptians, the Greeks adopted the practice of giving rings to their lovers. These rings were thought to represent devotion, and many of them depicted Eros or Cupid, the god of love. Then Rome conquered Greece. They also adopted the wedding ring tradition but with iron and copper wedding rings. The iron rings sometimes bore key designs that symbolized that the wife now had control of the household goods. By the 2nd century CE, most wedding rings were gold, and by the 3rd and 4th centuries CE the style of gold wedding rings became more luxurious and a way to flaunt the giver’s wealth.

 

We mirror the Ancient Egyptian wedding ring traditions in that we even have wedding rings, that we wear them on our left hand ring finger, and that they indicate our marital status. Over 6000 years, rings have changed but why they are worn has not.