Betrothal Rings vs. Engagement Rings: History, Meaning, and Tradition

(Updated December 2025)

Many people think the terms betrothal ring and engagement ring are interchangeable, but historically, they carried distinct meanings. While both signified a commitment to marry, betrothal rings were part of a morally and legally binding contract, a practice that dates back to the early Catholic Church and other traditions.

Understanding these differences helps us appreciate how marriage, love, and ritual were intertwined across cultures.

Betrothal vs. Engagement: The Key Difference

Engagement: A modern promise to marry, often symbolic and informal.

Betrothal: Historically, a serious, legally recognized commitment, sometimes blessed with sacramental graces.

In the Catholic tradition, betrothal was considered morally binding, and breaking it could be appealed in a civil or diocesan court. Engagements, in contrast, were more flexible promises without the same legal or spiritual weight. 

Betrothal as a Marriage Contract

Betrothal wasn’t just a promise, it was the start of the marriage contract. Key elements included:

• Provision for the bride’s dowry
• Settlement guarantees in case of the husband’s early death
• Ritual sealing of the contract with hand-holding, a ring, and signatures
• Exchange of a kiss, symbolizing union and agreement

If the groom broke the contract without just cause, he was obligated to return any gifts or tokens received. Betrothals could be mutually dissolved or ended for serious offenses like infidelity, heresy, or apostasy.

 

This betrothal ring displays a Moorish castle with a hinged side that opens to reveal a small table and four chairs, symbolizing the couple's new home.

 

Catholic Betrothal Rituals and Spiritual Significance

During the betrothal ceremony, the engagement or betrothal ring was blessed, sometimes thought to be imbued with sacramental grace,  similar to holy water or a blessing. While not a sacrament like matrimony, this ritual imbued the union with spiritual significance, making the commitment deeper than a modern engagement.

Jewish Betrothal Rings: Symbolism and Craftsmanship

Betrothal rings were not limited to Catholics. In 16th–18th century South Germany, Jewish grooms often gave their future brides rings a year before marriage. These rings:

• Were ornamental and often too large to wear daily
• Featured miniature castles, temples, or palaces symbolizing the couple’s new home
• Contained inscriptions such as “Mazal Tov” (“Good Luck”)

Some rings were community-owned, while wealthier families passed them down as heirlooms. Over time, craftsmanship advanced with intricate filigree and enameling, though gemstones were rare for religious reasons.

Betrothal vs. Engagement: What We Keep Today

While modern engagement rings are largely symbolic, understanding betrothal reminds us that marriage used to involve spiritual, legal, and communal dimensions. Today:

Some Catholic couples still participate in betrothal ceremonies

Engagement rings honor the historical promise while allowing flexibility

The tradition emphasizes commitment, blessing, and union beyond romance alone.

The Legacy of Betrothal Rings

Betrothal rings illustrate how marriage was historically serious, binding, and sacred. While modern engagements often focus on romance, historical betrothals combined spiritual blessing, legal agreement, and family involvement.

 

 

Photo credits: Wikimedia, wikimedia, flickr