How the wedding shower originated

Like many wedding customs and traditions, the history of the wedding shower is steeped in etiquette, but the actual origin is unclear. The practice is said to be tied to dowry practices and origins in the Netherlands. The story surrounds a high-society Dutch woman who didn’t want to marry the rich farmer her father had chosen for her, but rather wanted to marry a poor miller instead. Her father rejected the idea and in an effort to force his daughter to marry the man he chose said he wouldn’t provide a dowry unless she married the farmer. The story goes on to tell how the villagers joined together to “shower” the woman with household items and other small gifts so she could marry the man of her choice. This particular account has a happy ending saying these actions touched the heart of the father and changed his mind. He decided to allow her to marry the man she loved.

Second possible origin of the wedding shower

According to a second account, the history of wedding showers in the United States isn’t quite so romantic. In this case, the practice of holding a wedding shower grew popular in the States in the late 1800s when women of high society celebrated bridal showers for the gossip, food, the opportunity to give gifts and to talk about the bride-to-be’s new upcoming role. During these shower parties, small gifts were placed inside a paper parasol in order to “shower” them over the bride-to-be.

 

Third possible origin of the wedding shower

A third story tells a more practical story about a young woman who couldn’t afford to buy her friend a wedding gift. She invited others to a party and told all to bring a small gift. In this way, she did what she could to give her bride-to-be friend a gift. And lastly, it is suggested the bridal shower originated in the United Sates as a more recent invention created to sell more gifts rather than the result of any tradition.

No matter the origin, today, the wedding shower has evolved into anything from a more modest affair to an extravagant themed party. In any case, the bride is “showered” with gifts. And while the practice of the bridal shower has evolved over time to include both the bride and the groom, much of the original wedding shower etiquette still surrounds this special occasion. Like many wedding traditions, learning the history behind the bridal shower can be used to create your own unique, modern way to celebrate this special occasion. 

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Photo credits: pixabay.com, maxpixel

Armenian style engagement party: the Khosk-Kap

Armenia is a small country with the distinction of being the first to adopt Christianity as a state religion back in the early 4^th century. This connection still plays an important role in Armenian weddings which are celebrated as a huge holiday traditionally celebrated for seven days and seven nights. For instance, traditionally the “God family” serves as witnesses at the wedding. What or who is a God family? It’s a couple who must be praiseworthy and looked up to. Usually, this is the married couple closest to the bride and groom, and the kavor “Godfather” is responsible for many of the wedding details and is expected to bring the most expensive wedding gift at a separate ceremony specifically for gift giving. This man is also responsible for guiding the couple in their life following the wedding.

If the answer is yes, the groom presents the engagement ring.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Khosk-Arnel

These days, that week-long celebration has become outdated, but many of the rich Armenian traditions are still intact. One of these traditions is the Khosk-Arnel” (asking for permission) which is the occasion that officially starts the engagement. 

Here in the west we might call this an engagement party, but not what we would consider traditional. For in the Armenian tradition, this is the event where the groom’s parents officially meet the bride’s parents. But it more than that. It’s also the time the groom’s parents asked the bride’s parents for their daughter’s hand in marriage. 

Let’s face it, this is a little risky if people don’t know each other, but if all goes according to plan and they said “yes”, the groom-to-be presents the engagement ring to his new fiancee. When she accepts the celebration begins with eating, drinking, and Armenian-style partying which includes a priest blessing the ring and the couple’s future plans.

Khosk-Kap

Today this tradition is being replaced with the “Khosk-Kap” where the groom is the one to ask for the bride’s hand in marriage. In most cases, the groom makes his intentions clear to the bride’s immediate family before the Khosk-Kap, however, even this tradition has lost some of its popularity.

Groom's family arrives with a flower arrangement and a box of chocolates.

 

Modern less-formal Khosk-Arnel

A more modern take on this ritual is the less-formal Khosk-Arnel. This modern take on the engagement ceremony only includes the couple’s immediate family. The groom’s family is invited to the bride’s house for coffee (or tea) or dinner. They arrive with a flower arrangement and a box of chocolates. For this take on an Armenian engagement party, the groom asks the bride’s father for her hand in marriage.

All of these variations are ripe with elements that can be used to design a unique one-of-a-kind engagement party of your own.

Photo credits: youtube, youtube

How to Play the Mr. & Mrs. Shoe Game at Your Wedding (with 30 Fun Questions!)

Wedding receptions are full of laughter, love, and unforgettable moments, and the Mr. & Mrs. Shoe Game (also known as the Shoe Game) is one of the best ways to get everyone smiling. This lighthearted activity lets the bride and groom show how well they really know each other while entertaining the guests.

If you’re planning a fun, interactive moment for your wedding or shower, this simple game is a perfect fit. Here’s everything you need to know from how to play to the funniest questions to ask!

What is the Mr. & Mrs. shoe game?

The Mr. & Mrs. Game (also called the Shoe Game) is a popular wedding reception activity inspired by The Newlywed Game. Instead of answering with words, the bride and groom raise shoes to show their answers and the results are always hilarious!

It’s easy to set up, fun for guests of all ages, and gives everyone a chance to see the couple’s personalities shine. 

 

The Mr. & Mrs. Game is also known as the Shoe Game.

 

How to play the shoe game

To play the shoe game game, the bride and groom take of their shoes. The groom holds one of the bride's shoes in one hand and one of his shoes in the other. The bride does the same. They are seated back to back so they can's see each other and the MC or DJ starts asking questions.

 

  

What You’ll Need:

• Two chairs placed back-to-back

• One of the bride’s shoes and one of the groom’s shoes (each will hold one of each)

• A list of fun questions

• An MC, DJ, or friend to ask the questions

The Rules:

1. The bride and groom sit back-to-back so they can’t see each other.

2. Each holds one of their own shoes and one of their partner’s shoes.

3. The host asks a series of questions — for example, “Who’s more likely to forget an anniversary?”

4. Without speaking, the couple raises the shoe of the person they think best fits the answer.

5. The guests laugh (a lot).

The game usually takes about 10–15 minutes and includes around 20–30 questions.

It's fun and gets everyone laughing and even people near the back of the room can "see" the couple's responses.

 

Funny & Romantic Shoe Game Questions

Here are some fun ideas to get you started! Feel free to add your own or invite guests to suggest questions on wedding shoe game note cards at each table.

Funny Questions

• Who’s most likely to drop their phone in the toilet?

• Who takes longer to get ready?

• Who spends more money?

• Who hogs the blankets?

• Who’s more likely to burn dinner?

• Who’s the better dancer?

Romantic or Sweet Questions

• Who said “I love you” first?

• Who’s the better cook?

• Who’s the bigger romantic?

• Who gives better gifts?

• Who’s the better kisser?

• Who’s more likely to plan a surprise date?

Everyday Life Questions

• Who has to have the last word?

• Who spends more time on social media?

• Who’s more organized?

• Who’s more likely to get lost?

• Who’s the bigger baby when they have a cold?

Tip: Keep your audience in mind! If kids or older family members are present, skip any overly personal or adult-themed questions.

Tips for Hosting the Shoe Game

• Choose the right host: A lively MC or DJ keeps the energy up.

• Start simple, end funny: Build to your most hilarious questions near the end.

• Use a microphone: So even guests at the back can enjoy it.

• Keep it light-hearted: The goal is laughter, not competition!

  
  

The Mr. & Mrs. Shoe Game is a timeless, laughter-filled way to celebrate your relationship in front of family and friends. It’s easy to plan, needs almost no equipment, and guarantees great memories — and lots of giggles — at your wedding reception or shower..

 

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Photo credits:  pxfuel, Anthony Carpenter