About Wedding Traditions & Meanings

Sunday, September 29, 2019

Tradition of the consummation ceremony


Wedding traditions range from precious to archaic and strange. If I say the words, “wedding night,” what comes to mind? In today’s Western cultures, couples work to create a special romantic destination that’s both special and memorable. But that wasn’t always the case. Just a few hundred years ago, the tradition of the bedding ceremony, also known as the consummation ceremony was a wedding night celebration that included witnesses…sometimes a gallery of witnesses. 




Consummation meaning

 
In Webster’s 1818 Dictionary, the definition of the word “consummation” in relation to marriage is “the most intimate union of the sexes, which completes the connubial relation.” Today’s Cambridge Dictionary defines it as “the act of making a marriage or romantic relationship complete by having sex.” The consummation ceremony provided witness to this act.



The Consummation Ceremony

The purpose of the consummation ceremony was to confirm the consummation of the marriage. According to Eric Metaxas, author of Martin Luther: The Man Who Rediscovered God and Changed the World, “Sixteenth-century marriages in Germany were typically two-stage affairs. There was first a small ceremony with a handful of witnesses and then a larger event with a church procession and guests from out of town. But the initial event was capped with the consummation of the marriage, so the marriage—actually called the Kopulation, which is etymologically related to the more anodyne word “couple”—was in fact consummated before the wedding.” If the consummation didn’t take place, then there was no wedding. Today, we think of things the other way around. Marriage ceremony, THEN the consummation of the marriage. But back them the consummation came first—in full view of the witnesses. In most traditions, these witnesses included family, friends, and neighbors.

 

According to historian, Alison Weir, this consummation ritual was also practiced by the royals in in medieval times. “The royal newlyweds were put to bed by their wedding guests, toasted, and then blessed by a bishop or priest.” Historian Lucy Worseley elaborates further saying the “room would have been full of people cheering them on.”

What prompted me to look deeper into this topic is that Martin Luther (a former monk) and his wife Kathie (a former nun) took part in their betrothal night consummation with witnesses in the room. Among their witnesses were Luther’s closest friend, Justus Jonas, a man by the name of Lucas Cranach and his wife, Barbara, who Kathie lived with before the wedding, as well as another local friend named John Apel who was chosen by the university to serve as the “official witness” to the marriage. In Luther’s day, they considered the marriage bed to be holy, and celebrated in the consummation with a joy shared by all present.

https://www.amazon.com/Martin-Luther-Rediscovered-Changed-World-ebook/dp/B06WLK115W/ref=as_li_ss_tl?keywords=martin+luther&qid=1569783306&sr=8-4&linkCode=sl1&tag=hubpages08b17-20&linkId=13fb9c4f44d0e009c6c55524b01c4bc4&language=en_US


In general, witnesses of the bedding ceremony watched the bride and groom upon their wedding bed from within the room. Sometimes, the witnesses left just before the actual consummation, but in other cases people circled the bed to be sure the consummation was clearly viewed. In some situations, witnesses observed the couple from an observation deck above the bed. Can you imagine!

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Source: Martin Luther: The Man Who Rediscovered God and Changed the World

 
Photo credits: Wikipedia, wikimedia, wikipedia


Thursday, August 29, 2019

Would you make a good viking bride?




Modern Viking weddings are trending, along with Viking wedding clothes, wedding feasts and more, but when you look at Viking wedding traditions historically, I have to ask: Could you be a Viking Bride? Before you answer that, let’s take a closer look at what they went through.


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Viking brides didn’t plan the wedding
Could you stand back and let others plan your wedding without you? The Viking bride’s wedding coordinators and planners were family. She didn’t have any real say in it, not even for the actual marriage ceremony. And as for that ceremony, if you aren’t one for rituals, you wouldn’t cut it as a Viking bride, because in the Viking tradition, each marriage ritual was deemed necessary. Why? Because they were essential to earn the blessings of the gods. This was vital, even down to the day of the week chosen for the wedding. Viking marriages were performed on Fridays because in the Norse religion that was a sacred day to the goddess of marriage.


Viking Marriage – A Union of Families not Just Couples

For Viking brides, the wedding and the preparation leading to it was a long process. While that's still the case for many weddings today, the Viking wedding wasn’t just about the union of a man and woman--it was about the union of families with long-lasting legal consequences. So if you are an independent sort that likes to keep your private life private, you wouldn’t make a good Viking bride because this meant numerous negotiations to determine the “terms” of the marriage which were formally agreed to through legal delegates. This included details like the bride’s dowry, and the groom’s financial holdings and properties. So instead of the bride really having a say, the groom’s family and their delegates were the ones who carried proposals with beneficial terms for the marriage to the bride’s family. On top of this, sometimes, when the dowry was paid, an animal sacrifice was necessary. So if you're an animal lover, probably not a candidate for being a Viking bride. The animals used were associated with gods related to fertility.
  • For the god Thor (associated with fertility): a goat
  • For the god Freyr (associated with virility and prosperity): a boar or horse
  • For the goddess Freyja (along with war, death she was associated with love, sex, beauty, fertility, and gold): a sow

Bathhouse Ritual for the Viking Bride

Before the wedding, Viking brides and grooms were separated so they could get rid of their former “selves” before coming together as husband and wife. For the bride, this required a ritual involving her “maidenhood.” The bride’s mother, married sisters and other married female relatives and friends were involved in this ritual which included removing everything that symbolized her “maiden” standing. For instance, the circlet worn in the hair of Scandinavian girls that symbolized their virginity was removed (and stored for the bride’s future daughter).

The bride's long hair expressed her sexual allure

No Special Wedding Gown

Viking brides didn’t wear an ornate or special dress. Instead the emphasis was on her hair and the wedding crown. What’s interesting is why the hair was the focus. It turns out that in the Viking culture, the hair expressed the bride’s sexual allure and the longer her hair, the better. So if you have short hair or even shoulder length hair, what message would you be sending as a Viking bride? I guess there’s always hair extensions. As for the bridal crown, it was most often a family heirloom crafted of silver.

So could you be a Viking bride? Not able to plan your wedding, forced to hammer out financial terms as two families rather than two individuals, living totally separate and not seeing each other as you got rid of your “old self” and on top of all that, no wedding dress but rather wearing long hair to express your sexual allure! I do like the idea of modern Viking-themed weddings but as for the rituals from the past? That’s where they belong. 


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Photo credits: Amazon, Johannes Gehrts, Wikimedia