(Updated July, 2026)
Today, when we hear the word "bridesmaid," we think of close friends standing beside the bride on her wedding day. One may be designated the maid of honor if unmarried or the matron of honor if married.
Modern wedding parties often include a mix of married and unmarried attendants, but historically, bridesmaids were typically young, unmarried women considered to be of marriageable age. Serving as a bridesmaid was not only an honor; it was sometimes seen as an opportunity to find a husband.
Duties of the Maid of Honor: Past and Present
Modern maid of honor responsibilities often include:
- Helping plan the bridal shower or bachelorette party
- Assisting the bride with dress shopping
- Coordinating the bridesmaids
- Helping the bride get dressed on the wedding day
- Straightening the train before walking down the aisle
- Holding the bridal bouquet during the ceremony
- Giving a speech or toast at the reception
Historical duties were quite different.
In the 1700s, the maid of honor might help remove and hold the bride's gloves during the ceremony. Instead of carrying a bouquet, she could be entrusted with the dow-purse—a symbolic representation of the groom's gift or financial provision for his wife. Coins were sometimes placed upon the service book as part of the ceremony, a custom that survived in parts of northern England into the 19th century.
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| The matron of honor joined the right hands of the bride and groom. |
Matron of Honor in Ancient Rome
Ancient Roman weddings placed great importance on the woman who attended the bride.
The principal attendant was expected to be a model of virtue, known for her fidelity and good reputation. She could not have been married more than once and was required to have a living husband at the time of the ceremony.
One of her most important duties was to join the right hands of the bride and groom for the first time, symbolizing the union of the couple.
Unique Bridesmaid Duties Through History
Bridesmaids have performed some unusual tasks over the centuries.
During the medieval period, bridesmaids reportedly dipped plum buns into spiced ale and encouraged the bride to eat them to restore her energy before the festivities.
Other customs included:
- Leading the bridegroom to the church while the groomsmen escorted the bride.
- Creating handmade wedding favors from ribbons and flowers.
- Pinning favors to guests' sleeves or shoulders as they departed.
Victorian bridesmaids also looked quite different from their modern counterparts. Bridesmaids were expected to be younger than the bride and dressed entirely in white, complete with short veils. The bride distinguished herself with a longer, more elaborate veil and train.
By the early 20th century, this custom faded, and white became reserved almost exclusively for the bride.
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| A wedding from middle 1800s |
Bridesmaid Superstitions
Wedding traditions are often intertwined with superstition, and bridesmaids were no exception.
Victorian bridesmaids sometimes carried garlic, herbs, and grains to ward off evil spirits and protect the bride from misfortune.
Another superstition warned that if a bridesmaid stumbled while walking down the aisle, she would never marry.
Then there is the familiar saying:
"Always a bridesmaid, never a bride."
While the phrase may sound unfortunate today, being a bridesmaid was once considered an excellent way to meet potential husbands.
However, there was a catch. In the 16th century, it was believed that a woman who served as a bridesmaid three times without marrying had been cursed by evil spirits. Fortunately, there was a remedy: she simply needed to serve four more times to reach the lucky number seven and break the curse.
From Ancient Rome to Modern Weddings
From joining the hands of Roman newlyweds to carrying garlic in Victorian processions, bridesmaids have played an important role in wedding ceremonies for centuries.
Thankfully, today's bridesmaids are more likely to carry bouquets than herbs and can walk down the aisle without worrying about an ancient curse.
Thanks for reading! Have you ever been a bridesmaid? If so, how many times? Let us know in the comments.
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