About Wedding Traditions & Meanings

Friday, November 11, 2022

Wedding ring customs from the ancient world

Delving into the history of wedding rings leads to ancient cultures with rings crafted of similar materials but symbolizing different meanings. Where did the wedding ring custom get its start? Like many ancient customs it is not something agreed upon even by historians. In my research, I give that nod of the head toward the ancient Egyptians, but some suggest it goes back all the way to the Neanderthals.

 

ancient wedding rings

Wedding ring customs through the centuries

Marriage existed throughout ancient cultures around the world. And from this tradition came the custom of wedding rings. The look of wedding rings has changed throughout the centuries. Earliest rings were crafted of leather, ivory or bone. While the materials used were similar among early cultures, it's interesting to note that what wedding rings represented differed from one culture to another.


 

Ancient Egyptian wedding rings

The origin of wedding rings isn’t one hundred percent certain, but based on archeological evidence dating back 3000 years, most historians agree that ancient Egypt was the first culture to exchange wedding rings. These rings were intricately crafted into beautiful jewelry from braided reeds and hemp and placed on the fourth finger as a symbol of the love. However, the ring exchange was not part of a public wedding ceremony but took place in private with rings presented as gifts. Historians have determined through hieroglyphics that the shape of the ring, the circle, symbolized eternal life and the opening in the center was thought to be a portal to a future between two newlyweds.

 


Ancient Roman wedding rings

Marriages in ancient Rome had to conform to Roman law and were categorized by social class. This included three different categories of weddings: Usus, Coemptio, and Confarreatio. For the lowest class, the word for marriage was Usus. Today, we can compare it to a common-law marriage. For the next class up, marriage was known as the Coemptio and involved purchasing the bride. In this case, not all historians agree on whether this was an actual purchase or a symbolic sale, but either way, the ring represented a purchase. However, neither of these marriages were considered legal.

 

Roman key ring

The only authorized marriage in Ancient Rome was the Confarreatio, a privilege reserved for the elite upper class. These marriages were presided over and the groom presented his bride with a ring during the ceremony. The wedding ring tradition began with rings made of flint and bone. Later rings were crafted of copper, silver, and gold. Most Confarreatio rings were crafted of iron or gold with the iron ring worn in private and the gold ring worn in public. Even in these upper-class marriages, the rings were not considered symbols of love but rather symbols of possession—that the wife belonged to the husband. However, in the brides favor, it also meant that the married woman had a right to her husband’s possessions. 

 

Ancient Greek wedding rings

The first Ancient Greek wedding rings were also crafted of leather, ivory or bone, but when metal rings were introduced, a simple gold band was worn on the left hand as an engagement ring and was then moved to the right hand when married. Later gold rings inlaid with colorful gems, crystals, or glass became popular. These precious rings were often passed from one generation to the next becoming the first heirloom rings. 


Indian wedding rings

Historically, in Ancient India, according to Manu Smiriti, the laws of Manu or Manava Dharma Shastra, eight main forms of Hindu marriages existed in ancient India. I will create another post to explain that in detail at another time. In ancient India, gold was the most idolized form of jewelry. This love of gold jewelry even extended to dressing animals, like elephants, in intricate gem-studded pieces. It is thought that this love for jewelry stemmed from the culture’s belief in mystical qualities thought to protect the wearer from evil. Traditional Indian brides wore the wedding ring on the right hand because the left hand is considered unclean.

A couple of other things worth mentioning include the Nath, also commonly known as the nose stud or Indian bridal nose ring. Ancient Indian brides (and brides today) wore this bridal nose ring with a long chain of gold connected to the ear. This is not a wedding ring but is part of the bride’s ensemble. 

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Photo credits: pixnio.com


Saturday, September 10, 2022

Wedding lasso ceremony

The wedding lasso tradition is thought to have started in seventh century Spain and is a tradition steeped in ancient Catholic faith. Today it is a popular choice for traditional Hispanic and Filipino weddings as a ceremony that provides a visual representation of two people becoming one in marriage. With that said, it is also incorporated in weddings of non-religious couples who choose this unity ritual for the symbolism it offers. Either way, those who choose the lasso ceremony, often do so to honor their heritage. 

lasso rosary

What does the wedding lasso symbolize?

Lassoing symbolizes unity with a voluntary tethering that represents a binding love and commitment to each other in the eyes of friends, family, and God. For the lasso, you’ll need a ribbon, cord, rope or a large rosary. The tether of your choice maybe draped around the groom’s neck or shoulders, and then the bride’s (creating a figure eight) or it can be draped as a binding around the wrists like a handfasting ceremony. This is done while the wedding vows are exchanged followed by a short prayer for the couple as they stand or kneel.

Wedding lasso prayer

The prayer offered is quick:

O God, bless the marriage of [Groom name] and [Bride name], who come to you seeking your blessing.


Who drapes the lasso and when?

Traditionally, the Godparents of the bride and groom or wedding sponsors enjoy the role of draping the lasso over the groom and bride during the wedding. If Godparents or sponsors are not available, the officiant makes it part of their ceremonial duties. The groom is lassoed first and then the bride and the lasso is often secured with pins to keep it in place. Once the lasso is swathed across the couple it is worn until the end of the ceremony. When the ceremony is over, the lasso is removed by those who put it in place, and it is given to the bride as a keepsake of her standing as mistress to her husband’s heart and home.

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Amazon, Amazon

 

Thursday, August 18, 2022

Is a Halloween wedding right for you?

"How about a Halloween wedding?"

"Halloween! What would that look like?"

Before you dismiss Halloween for your wedding, take in the bigger picture. 

Halloween Wedding


Financially speaking, when it comes to planning a wedding, Halloween is a holiday with benefits. In general, the cheapest months to book wedding vendors are January, March, April and November because for the most part, wedding vendors are more available these months. The same holds true for Halloween. As a result, if you are a savvy planner, you can find discounts and sometimes special incentives to book a Halloween wedding. 


Halloween wedding decorations

Fall, Halloween, and Thanksgiving offer a plethora of options for decorating. If you don't have a wedding planner, check out places like Lings which offers pre-made free-standing floral arrangements designed for decorating the wedding archway, aisle, welcome entrance, table centerpieces, etc.  

You can save on decorating for your reception too. A plentiful array of inexpensive Halloween decorations offer a variety of color with a fall theme including squash, gourds, and pumpkins in a variety of colors like green, yellow, red, blue, white, teal, purple, pink and even black. Use candle lanterns for ambience, or add a splash of color with potted mums available in shades of orange, bronze, burgundy, or white and complimented with silk leaves, nuts, dried fall berries, or multicolored Flint corn to create attractive centerpieces. Stores like Hobby Lobby sell a variety of centerpiece selections at a reasonable price. 

Halloween a less busy holiday

When it comes to holiday weddings, events planned around Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year’s present busier schedules, and more expensive travel reservations, hotels, etc. Halloween does not pose that issue. Not only can you find better deals for venues, but if you plan a honeymoon following a Halloween wedding, you can often enjoy cheaper travel-related prices. For instance, if you want a beach wedding, the shoulder season in Florida, includes November making it a reasonable possibility.

  

Difference between Halloween wedding and Halloween theme

So far, what I’ve discussed is a wedding that takes place on or near Halloween. If you want, this can be a traditional wedding of your dreams that takes advantage of the benefits associated with the holiday. But now, let’s talk about a Halloween wedding theme. This can be as creative as your imagination allows, but if you are thinking of a church wedding, not every church is open to having a Halloween themed wedding if you dress up like the living dead. 

However, if you think it a quirky fun fit to have a costume wedding for the bride and groom, wedding party, and guests if they want to participate, then Halloween is a perfect fit.

You can even pull of an elegant classy look with the right dress in black. Add a splash of color to pull of a bold color scheme. And if someone wants to complain about the black dress, you can point to the history of the wedding dress and how traditionally women were married in their best black or dark colored dress.

 

Wedding Arch

Select the wedding venue to meet your needs

If you choose a different venue, like a large house, or an old house, or barn, you can capitalize on the freedom to choose a spooky theme with guests dressed in costume. However, one more thing to consider, if you invite older guests like a grandmother, make sure to prepare them. Historically, Halloween celebrates superstition, lost souls, and would be considered a dark celebration. This might offend some older conservative guests.

The bottom line is that if you are planning to get married, Halloween is a day that offers some positives. How or if you take advantage of them is up to you. If you decide to go for it, what a Halloween wedding would look like for you is up to you. It does offers a new avenue of possibilities. As you consider them, take a step back and think through your choices. One important question to answer is: Do you really want your wedding album to be filled with photos of you wearing skeleton makeup? If not, you can have a wedding that takes advantage of the savings and leave the costumes in the attic. The choice is yours. It’s your wedding! 

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Tuesday, June 14, 2022

Do you wear your engagement ring on your wedding day

 
The day you received your engagement ring is a day you’ll never forget. It’s a story that will pass to friends and family and maybe even generations. The ring holds special memories, but do you wear your engagement ring when you walk down the aisle?


Do you wear your engagement ring on your wedding day

Do you wear your engagement ring on your wedding day?

Many brides-to-be don’t think about what to do with their engagement ring on their wedding day, until that day! Or maybe at the rehearsal. If you’re reading this to find out what to do about your engagement ring on the day of your wedding, relax. You have a number of options.

What to do with your engagement ring on your wedding day?

First, you can wear your engagement ring if you want, but it does tend to make things a little awkward during the ring exchange if you follow wedding tradition. Traditionally, the groom slips the wedding ring onto the ringfinger of the left hand during the vow exchange. Wedding ring tradition also places the wedding ring on the finger before the engagement ring. So if you wear the engagement ring, you might have to pause to remove it with nervous fingers and then slip it back in place after the wedding band is on.

Wear engagement ring on another finger

This is one of those personal choices. I think it is an unnecessary risk as I’ve been to a wedding where the ring was dropped and disappeared under pews. Wedding guests hunted for it dressed in their wedding finery. It did create a memory, but if it isn’t the type of memory you want to add to your special day. Here are some alternatives to consider:

  • Wear your engagement ring on your right hand for the ceremony. Once your wedding ring is in place, you can move it to your left hand or wait until after the ceremony.
  • Make the engagement ring part of the ring ceremony with instructions for the groom to place the wedding band on the finger first, followed by the engagement ring.
  • Wear your engagement ring on your left hand, and have the groom place the wedding band on top of the engagement ring. After the ceremony you can put them right. (Talk to the wedding officiant about this plan and ask if any problem exists from a religious standpoint).
  • Give the engagement ring to trusted family member, friend, or someone in the wedding party the Maid of Honor to hold during the wedding. You can retrieve it after the ceremony and still have it available for photos. If you choose this option, make a plan for the ring the return of the ring after the ceremony.
  • Wear your engagement ring on a delicate chain as a necklace for the ceremony.



From ancient times, the ring exchange is a tradition that represents the commitment two people make to each other on their wedding day. The last option is to omit the ring exchange ceremony and opt for an alternative ritual like handfasting. If you do something like this, you can always choose to exchange vows with a ring exchange privately.