A look back at wedding reception origins

Sometimes terminology surrounding weddings can leave me scratching my head. That’s one of the reasons I write this blog. I like to hunt down wedding origins and traditions and their meanings. I like to know why we do what we do. For instance, why is a wedding toast called a toast? I’ve already answered that one in the History of the Wedding Toast. And why do we give away the bride? And why is the party following the wedding called a reception? 

My home wedding reception at my parents' home.

Why is a wedding reception called a reception?

That one, is actually a little easier to understand when you realize the word “reception” has more than one definition. If you think of it as “the act or process of receiving something sent, given, or inflicted then it doesn’t seem to fit,” BUT the second meaning is very fitting. “a formal social occasion held to welcome someone or to celebrate a particular event.” However, it turns out that both definitions fit when you look at the receiving line tradition at the reception where guests were greeted by the bride and groom, hosts and parents as they greeted every guest.

Origins of the wedding reception

I recently celebrated my 50^th wedding anniversary, and back when I got married, my middle-class parents hosted the wedding reception in their home. They moved all the furniture out of the living room and dining room and set up rented tables and chairs. We fried chicken, rolled luncheon meat platters, and some of my aunts brought dishes to share. It turns out that in our Western culture, that was the typical wedding reception celebration up until World War II. At that time wedding receptions were usually held in the bride’s home. The family’s financial status determined the style of the reception. A wealthy family might hold an elaborate ball, while a middle-class family might put on an afternoon luncheon and tea like my parents did.

But that goes back only to World War II. What about before that?

 19^th century wedding receptions

In the 19^th century, weddings typically took place early and the wedding reception was most often a breakfast held in the bride’s home. The bride and groom “received” the wedding guests who offered words of congratulation. Etiquette dictated that guests addressed the bride first unless they didn’t know her. In that case, the groom introduced the guests to his new bride after receiving their congratulations. And get this. Congratulations were NEVER offered to the bride because it implied, she was “lucky” to have a man propose to her! How uncouth!

For these breakfast receptions, most often only the bridal party were seated, mostly because homes didn’t have the room to seat everyone. In fact, only a fraction of the guests who attended the wedding were invited to the reception because the average house just couldn’t fit everybody. There was no music or entertainment, but cake was served (but not eaten at the reception). Back then wedding cake was usually a dark, rich fruitcake with white frosting and was cut and boxed and given to guests as they left the reception.

When the bride and groom left the reception breakfast, they were pelted with rice and shoes. Why shoes? Apparently, this was thought to bring good luck and fertility to the bride and groom, if they or their carriage was hit.

18^th Century Wedding Receptions

I didn’t find much information on 18^th century wedding receptions, but I did find info on history.org regarding Courtship and Marriage in Eighteenth Century Colonial Williamsburg which included a blurb about the wedding reception. It was called a wedding party, and held at the bride’s parents’ home. “…male guests would often race each other to the house where the winner received a bottle of alcohol.” And they did have decorations and “a table with white paper chains and lay out white foods for a collation. It included two white cakes. The guests consumed the groom’s cake, and sometimes left the bride’s cake untouched for the couple to save (in a tin of alcohol) to eat on each wedding anniversary. The party could last a few hours or several days.”

Vintage wedding ideas for the modern bride

• Plan your wedding reception at your parents’ home. If that isn’t possible, check with grandparents, and aunt and uncle, or even the parents of the groom. If none of these options are possible, you can always rent a vacation home to accommodate your wedding reception.
• If parents have a small home, plan a backyard wedding reception.
• Add the fun element of male guests racing each other to the house and award the winner with a bottle of alcohol or wine bearing your wedding label. 
• Consider an early wedding followed by a breakfast reception.

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Photo credits: Personal photo used with permission, wikimedia, peakpx, Wikimedia, pexels

4 Ancient Viking Marriage Traditions for Today

Viking-inspired wedding themes are growing in popularity. Some couples choose a Viking décor based on ancient Norse and Celtic history that include things like drinking mead from traditional drinking horns and tying the knot by handfasting. But for those who want to take their wedding beyond the usual accoutrements, incorporating one or more of the following long-forgotten ancient Viking wedding traditions may add that unique flare you’re looking for.

Get Married on a Friday

This first Viking wedding tradition isn’t something you see, but something to be experienced Set the wedding date for a Friday. Since Friday was considered sacred to Figg (Frigga), the wife of Odin, the highest ranking of the Aesir goddesses, Viking weddings were held on Fridays.

    

Exchange Swords and Rings

The Viking groom presented his bride with the family’s ancestral sword along with the wedding ring on its hilt. The bride then presented the groom with her family’s ancestral sword with his ring on the hilt. Where did the groom’s family sword come from? Before the wedding, the groom broke into the grave of an ancestor to retrieve the sword. As he entered the grave and emerged with the sword, it symbolized his death as a boy and his new life as a man.

Grooms had to enter grave and emerge with ancestoral sword.

Escorting the Bride

Another custom involving the family sword deals with who escorted the bride. Instead of the father walking the bride down the “aisle,’ a younger male family member escorted the bride. This young male carried the sword to be presented to the groom.

Sounding of the Horn

This tradition works well for couples getting married at a lakeside venue. Historically the Viking groom went out on the lake in a boat with ten of his friends before the wedding. When the hunting horn sounded, they came back to shore to take part in the wedding. For a little added authenticity, you can look for a Viking boat to rent for the occasion but they are hard to find. 

While most people don’t reenact ancient wedding traditions exactly, it can be fun to modernized them for today. Getting married on a Friday is the easiest wedding custom on this list, and finding a young man of the family to escort the bride won’t take much work, but no one is going to rob a grave for a sword, so including the sword ceremony will require buying swords and rings (unless you have an ancestral family sword). 

The fun part for people who do introduce the sword ceremony into their wedding is that they will have a family sword to pass on to their children. And as for the boat arrival of a groom, this one takes the most work and requires a lakeside wedding venue, a hunting horn to blow, and the availability of a boat. Any boat can work, but if you really want a Viking replica, the Karvi, with 13 rowing benches is about the right size. These wooden boats have a shallow draft hull designed for speed that can make beach landings and can navigate waters only a meter deep. The problem is that Viking boats for rent are hard to find in the States, but you can find Viking boats for hire in the UK. If you know of other places to find Viking boats for hire, please let me know in the comments.

For more  ideas for Viking traditions to include for your wedding, check out ancient-origins.net.

Vintage Handmade Ceremonial Viking Mead Drinking HornSet Of 4

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Photo credits: wikimedia, pixabay, maxpixel, J Cunningham

Top 3 fantasy wedding dresses for a magical wedding

By: Rebecca Krummert

Thinking of having a fantasy themed wedding? In our Western culture, one of the most important elements of a wedding is the bride’s dress. The bride wants to stand out. She wants to make the crowd say “Wow!” And it's no different for a fantasy wedding. People into the fantasy genre, whether based on old cultural traditions or the imaginative movies and books we have today, the centerpiece is the right fantasy wedding dress.

A medieval wedding dress is simple enough, you can even make one yourself.

Medieval wedding dresses

One of the most popular choices for a fantasy wedding dress is the Medieval style. Most Medieval styled dresses have a boatneck and have long flowing sleeves, that often flow all the way to the floor. Medieval styled dresses offer two options: Renaissance or Celtic. Renaissance dresses are usually a straighter cut, long and flowing. The Celtic style has a little more poof to the dress like the Victorian style.

If you don’t want a white dress, any color works with a Medieval style dress. These dresses are simple, yet elegant. That’s not to say you can’t find an extravagantly designed gown. On the other hand, it’s a great option for a bride who wants a fantasy wedding but doesn’t wish to spend hundreds of dollars on the dress. In fact, a medieval wedding dress is simple enough, you can even make one yourself if you are so inclined! 

Victorian wedding dresses

Victorian style wedding dresses can also bring a sense of fantasy to your wedding. Since it’s a simple style, the color of the dress can be whatever the bride wants. The Victorian style is a type of ballgown with a tight bodice and usually a high collar at the back of the neck with a low square neckline. But, stylistic choices can also include a sleeveless dress or long, tight-fitting sleeves.

This style can also work for a Gothic or Steampunk wedding theme. A Victorian wedding dress is easily functional for all these wedding themes, and although Steampunk is not as popular as fantasy, it is an interesting twist to a wedding.

Black Vintage Renaissance Wedding Dress

Black wedding dresses

Black wedding dresses are one of the most popular choices among millennials and Gen Z’s and they make a perfect fantasy wedding dress. It’s a change from the traditional white and a chance to stand out from other weddings. Of course, some people will think black is the wrong color for a wedding dress. You might even hear comments like, “the bride looks more like she’s going to a funeral.” However, when we look at the history of wedding dresses, before Queen Victoria was married in 1840, a black wedding dress was the most popular choice, especially in Scandinavia. Only two other brides wore white on their wedding day before Queen Victoria, Philippa of England in 1406 and Mary, Queen of Scots, in 1559. White was actually the color of mourning for French queens, so Queen Mary was a bit of a Goth as her favorite color was white!

When it comes to picking a black wedding dress, fantasy brides have several choices of styles. Whether you choose to go full-on Gothic, Rococo Revival style, or a wear a beautiful black A-line princess style dress, the possibilities are endless. If you aren’t sure what style is for you, take a look at Medieval and Victorian styles. You can choose long sleeve, short sleeves, ballgown style or something with a straighter cut. I personally recommend wearing a black wedding dress. They are absolutely beautiful. A great choice for a fantasy wedding!

A bride has several different choices for her fantasy wedding day. Whether she’s a lover of unicorns and fairies or of knights in shining armor and dragons, there’s something for everyone in the fantasy genre. 

Photo credits:  Amazon, Wikipedia.org, Amazon