3 little know facts about ancient Roman weddings

 

I often mention Ancient Rome in relation to the origins of wedding traditions still practiced today in Western cultures. This post takes a look at three practices embedded within those traditions that we no longer include in our own rituals. 

Engagement ring and what it symbolized

Today's tradition of wearing an engagement ring on the fourth finger of the left hand, can be traced back to the Ancient Romans. This finger was believed to have a vein that ran directly to the heart, the Vena Amoris, which means 'vein of love'. Belief in that vein of love brought with it the hope that wearing the ring would encourage love, but legally this piece of wedding jewelry represented that the woman was about to pass from the ownership of her father to her future husband. Therefore, only women wore engagement rings in ancient Rome.

 

Ancient Roman wedding belt and the knot of Hercules

Ancient Roman brides wore a special dress and a veil and even wove flowers in the hair. What made their wedding attire unique is the girdle or belt that they wore. This belt was an essential part of bridal etiquette. By tradition, it was tied by the bride's mother with the knot of Hercules on the morning of her wedding. It represented the bride's purity, and with Hercules being the guardian of married life this strong knot could only be untied by the bride’s new husband on the wedding night. This knot created by two intertwined ropes can be traced back to ancient Egypt where it was used as a healing amulet, but in ancient Greece and ancient Rome where Hercules was known for his strength, it was a strong knot incorporated into a protective girdle worn by brides. Roman lore suggests the knot symbolized the legendary fertility of Hercules and in some way is related to the legendary Girdle of Diana captured from the Amazon Queen Hippolyta.

 

Marriage a negotiated deal

In ancient Rome, the male head of the household (the Paterfamilias) was responsible for finding a good match for all the children in his family. Marriage had to be outside the family. They weren’t allowed to even marry third or fourth cousins. While this sounds like an arranged marriage, one difference is that both the bride and groom had to be consenting adults and they could only be married to one person at a time (there were no divorces). However, what ‘consenting adults’ means today is far different from what it meant back then. The minimum age for females to marry was 12 and boys had to be at least 14. Once a suitable person was found, both families entered negotiations to decide which family would provide for the couple. Once the agreement was made the woman brought a dowry to her new husband’s family.

Marriage was looked at as a contract and some suggest that the giving of engagement rings in ancient Rome may have been used to signal that a contract had been made between the couple and their families. So while many practice some parts of these traditions it is easy to see why other parts have been left along the path of history.

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