In ancient Greece, the warrior society of Sparta reached its pinnacle from 431-404 B.C. following the defeat of the rival city-state Athens in the Peloponnesian War. The culture was centered on loyalty to the state which pressured people to have male children that would become citizen warriors. For this reason, the importance of marriage was emphasized in the Spartan culture but the wedding was certainly much different than the typical Greek wedding of Ancient Greece.
Male role in Sparta
When Spartan boys reached the age of 7, they left home and started a demanding state-sponsored training program that included both military and socialization education. So Spartan men devoted their lives to military service. From age 20, they were full-time soldiers and served on active duty until age 60. They had no other career path options. Their loyalty to the state came before everything else, including one’s family.
Men who put off marriage faced public shaming while men who fathered multiple sons might be rewarded. No pressure there! Once boys left home, they lived communally under harsh conditions. Frequent physical competitions actually endangered their lives and they were fed meager rations. This didn't mean they starved though. It means they learned to survive. Among their survival skills, they were expected to become experts at stealing food.
Life as a female Spartan
Spartan women were not conscripted into the military. They didn’t dress like a warrior princess or a super hero either. They were educated and enjoyed more freedom and status than other Greek women. This education was separate from the boys and as girls they were not required to leave home at a young age.
While they weren’t in the military, they did still engage in athletic competitions. These included sports like javelin throwing and wrestling along with competitions for dance and singing. For the most part, these events were designed to attract a husband. As adult women, Spartans owned and managed property and didn’t have household domestic responsibilities like cooking and cleaning because the Helots took care of these things. (The Helots were fellow Greeks from Laconia and Messenia who were conquered by the Spartans and treated as a slave class who did day-to-day tasks and unskilled labor).
Marriage in ancient Sparta
According the state’s customs, it was recommended that men marry at age 30 and women at 20. Because men were required to live in the communal barracks until age 30, couples who married earlier were forced to live separately until the husband turned 30. As for Spartan wedding customs, Spartan women didn’t have to worry about how to wear their hair for their wedding, because unlike Viking brides who wore their hair long, Spartan brides shaved their heads on the night of the "wedding." The bride then dressed in a man's cloak and sandals and was left alone in a dark room. Her husband-to-be visited this room and “captured” her. That’s it. They were married. Later, the groom dropped the bride off at her parents’ house which completed the “ceremony.”
Like I mentioned, following the marriage, men under 30 were still required to live in the communal housing. So once married, these husbands had to sneak out at night if they wanted to see their wives. Men who delayed marriage were publicly shamed, while those who fathered multiple sons could be rewarded.
With a closer look at Spartan weddings, I think for most people a Spartan wedding theme is a pass don’t you think?
Photo credits: pixabay, facebook, raakheeonquora
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