About Wedding Traditions & Meanings

Sunday, August 8, 2021

Wedding ring quilt symbolism and folklore

 

In some cases, wedding quilts are handed-down, from one generation to the next. Traditionally, they were handmade by mothers and grandmothers for their children as wedding or anniversary gifts. A woman in my town who is now in her 90s, and a holocaust survivor, still makes wedding quilts for her great-grandchildren's special day. In her case, even thought each quilt is newly crafted, the story behind each one is multi-generational.


When you give a quilt as a gift, no matter who makes it, each quilt has a story. And whether handcrafted by a loved one, bought from a quilter and given with love, or passed down as an heirloom, traditionally, the wedding quilt symbolizes the shared life couples will enjoy. 

Double wedding quilt pattern symbolism

The double wedding quilt pattern is the most popular choice as a wedding gift because it symbolizes love and romance, with interlocking rings that symbolize marriage. The symbolism is rich, but, as usual, the stories behind the origin are not in agreement.

The oldest symbolism suggests a link to the gimmal ring (also known as gimmel or puzzle rings), with designs like clasped hands incorporated into interlocking rings. These two rings were worn separately by the man and woman during the engagement period as betrothal rings. When the wedding day arrived, the interlocked rings became one ring, as the bride's wedding ring. Gimmal rings were most popular in Germany and England in the sixteenth and seventeenth centuries.

Another possible origin for the inspiration of the wedding quilt pattern is the Celtic Knot which has no start or finish. The knot represents eternity, and so the symbolism of the quilt is one of eternal love. However, in my opinion, the Celtic Knot is more complex than the traditional wedding quilt pattern. 



Wedding quilt folklore

Like most wedding traditions, the wedding quilt comes complete with superstitious folklore. In this case, if the newlywed couple sleeps beneath the quilt:

  • They will enjoy a blessed marriage
  • Be protected from bad dreams
  • Be protected from bad luck

 


Most newlyweds cherish a wedding quilt gift. Whether you put stock in the traditional symbolism or superstitions, remember that all symbolism starts somewhere. In this case, I'd say it starts with the one who makes the quilt and what inspires them to make it. This symbolism attaches to that unique quilt. Along with that, all wedding ring quilts represents the life the couple will share together and so the couple will add to the meaning of the quilt over time with their own story. 

Thanks for reading. If you have a story about your wedding quilt, feel free to share it in the comments.

 * * *

Some links in this post are affiliate links. We are a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for us to earn fees by linking to amazon.com and affiliate sites.

Photo credits: Amazon, Amazon

Sunday, May 16, 2021

Marriage traditions in ancient Sparta

 

In ancient Greece, the warrior society of Sparta reached its pinnacle from 431-404 B.C. following the defeat of the rival city-state Athens in the Peloponnesian War. The culture was centered on loyalty to the state which pressured people to have male children that would become citizen warriors. For this reason, the importance of marriage was emphasized in the Spartan culture but the wedding was certainly much different than the typical Greek wedding of Ancient Greece.

 

Male role in Sparta

When Spartan boys reached the age of 7, they left home and started a demanding state-sponsored training program that included both military and socialization education. So Spartan men devoted their lives to military service. From age 20, they were full-time soldiers and served on active duty until age 60. They had no other career path options. Their loyalty to the state came before everything else, including one’s family.

Men who put off marriage faced public shaming while men who fathered multiple sons might be rewarded. No pressure there! Once boys left home, they lived communally under harsh conditions. Frequent physical competitions actually endangered their lives and they were fed meager rations. This didn't mean they starved though. It means they learned to survive. Among their survival skills, they were expected to become experts at stealing food. 

 

 

Life as a female Spartan

Spartan women were not conscripted into the military. They didn’t dress like a warrior princess or a super hero either. They were educated and enjoyed more freedom and status than other Greek women. This education was separate from the boys and as girls they were not required to leave home at a young age. 

While they weren’t in the military, they did still engage in athletic competitions. These included sports like javelin throwing and wrestling along with competitions for dance and singing. For the most part, these events were designed to attract a husband. As adult women, Spartans owned and managed property and didn’t have household domestic responsibilities like cooking and cleaning because the Helots took care of these things. (The Helots were fellow Greeks from Laconia and Messenia who were conquered by the Spartans and treated as a slave class who did day-to-day tasks and unskilled labor).

  

Marriage in ancient Sparta

According the state’s customs, it was recommended that men marry at age 30 and women at 20. Because men were required to live in the communal barracks until age 30, couples who married earlier were forced to live separately until the husband turned 30. As for Spartan wedding customs, Spartan women didn’t have to worry about how to wear their hair for their wedding, because unlike Viking brides who wore their hair long, Spartan brides shaved their heads on the night of the "wedding." The bride then dressed in a man's cloak and sandals and was left alone in a dark room. Her husband-to-be visited this room and “captured” her. That’s it. They were married. Later, the groom dropped the bride off at her parents’ house which completed the “ceremony.”

Like I mentioned, following the marriage, men under 30 were still required to live in the communal housing. So once married, these husbands had to sneak out at night if they wanted to see their wives.  Men who delayed marriage were publicly shamed, while those who fathered multiple sons could be rewarded.

With a closer look at Spartan weddings, I think for most people a Spartan wedding theme is a pass don’t you think?

 

Photo credits: pixabay, facebook, raakheeonquora

Sunday, March 21, 2021

Memorable unity wedding ceremony ideas

Unity. It’s something unique in today’s world and an important ingredient for a happy marriage. For couples planning to add a unity ceremony to their wedding, it presents a symbolic reminder of love and oneness within the marriage as the bride and groom embark on their new life together as one. And you don’t have to feel like your unity ceremony is a cookie-cutter type ceremony. First of all, each bride and groom are uniquely special. Plus, you have plenty of unity wedding ideas to work with to make the ceremony your own. 


Unity candle

Let’s start with the unity candle. This one is traditional with a capital “T”. Two individual taper candles, which sit on each side of the larger unity candle, are usually lit by the parents or mothers of the bride and groom at the beginning of the wedding ceremony. These signify the two individuals coming from two different families. When the time comes for the unity ceremony, the bride and groom each take those candles lit by their parents and use them to light the single candle. As the two flames become one, it represents their unity in marriage. If you don’t have parents or mothers to light the candles they can be lit before the wedding ceremony starts. It still represents the two flames becoming one.

Unity candles are available in sets both plain or decorative. If you like the idea of the unity candle but wish to make it a little different, you can always use a decorative indoor candle lantern for a special effect. Plus the lantern makes a nice keepsake. If you go this route, be sure to choose a lantern(s) that are open or are easy to open so you don’t find yourself fiddling with the lantern when you are trying to light it.

Handfasting

The handfasting wedding ceremony, while it presents a picture of unity, offers abundance of other symbolism that works well for couples looking for ideas for their unity ceremony. This ancient Celtic ritual involves binding the couple’s hands together with cords or ribbons to symbolize the joining of two lives. This was once considered a Wiccan or Pagan ceremony but is now considered mainstream and is often included in Christian and secular weddings. Handfasting most often accompanies the exchange of vows but can be performed while a meaningful poem is read or even the history of tying the knot. The ribbons or cords used in this ceremony offer another layer of symbolism with meanings for the different colors used. 

 

Wine blending ceremony

For couples who enjoy drinking wine together, a wine blending ceremony makes the perfect choice. The couple each choose a wine to create their own special blend. For the ceremony, they mingle to two in one cup and then drink from it. The drinking together from a single cup is said to represent the sharing all of life’s experiences, both bitter and sweet and it represents unity because once blended it is impossible to separate one wine from the other. If you want to actually drink from the cup at the same time, a German Bridal Cup can make that possible.


 

Unity sand ceremony

The sand ceremony is a meaningful unity wedding ceremony for couples as well as for a blended family scenario, because a sand ceremony is an easy and fun way to incorporate children. In my opinion, using colored sand creates a great visual. The premise for this ceremony is the sand blends as it is poured and it is just about impossible to separate. Besides using colored sand, some people choose sand gathered from favorite vacation spots or other locations that hold special meaning to the couple.

If you choose a decorative container to pour the sand into, it becomes a special wedding keepsake which can be displayed in your new home.

Thanks for reading. If you have other unity ceremony ideas you'd like to share, be sure to leave them in a comment.

 

Some links in this post are affiliate links. We are a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for us to earn fees by linking to amazon.com and affiliate sites.

Photo credits: Flickr, Amazon, AnnaSwanSales, Flickr

Friday, October 30, 2020

3 little know facts about ancient Roman weddings

 

I often mention Ancient Rome in relation to the origins of wedding traditions still practiced today in Western cultures. This post takes a look at three practices embedded within those traditions that we no longer include in our own rituals. 


Engagement ring and what it symbolized

Today's tradition of wearing an engagement ring on the fourth finger of the left hand, can be traced back to the Ancient Romans. This finger was believed to have a vein that ran directly to the heart, the Vena Amoris, which means 'vein of love'. Belief in that vein of love brought with it the hope that wearing the ring would encourage love, but legally this piece of wedding jewelry represented that the woman was about to pass from the ownership of her father to her future husband. Therefore, only women wore engagement rings in ancient Rome.

 


Ancient Roman wedding belt and the knot of Hercules

Ancient Roman brides wore a special dress and a veil and even wove flowers in the hair. What made their wedding attire unique is the girdle or belt that they wore. This belt was an essential part of bridal etiquette. By tradition, it was tied by the bride's mother with the knot of Hercules on the morning of her wedding. It represented the bride's purity, and with Hercules being the guardian of married life this strong knot could only be untied by the bride’s new husband on the wedding night. This knot created by two intertwined ropes can be traced back to ancient Egypt where it was used as a healing amulet, but in ancient Greece and ancient Rome where Hercules was known for his strength, it was a strong knot incorporated into a protective girdle worn by brides. Roman lore suggests the knot symbolized the legendary fertility of Hercules and in some way is related to the legendary Girdle of Diana captured from the Amazon Queen Hippolyta.


 

Marriage a negotiated deal

In ancient Rome, the male head of the household (the Paterfamilias) was responsible for finding a good match for all the children in his family. Marriage had to be outside the family. They weren’t allowed to even marry third or fourth cousins. While this sounds like an arranged marriage, one difference is that both the bride and groom had to be consenting adults and they could only be married to one person at a time (there were no divorces). However, what ‘consenting adults’ means today is far different from what it meant back then. The minimum age for females to marry was 12 and boys had to be at least 14. Once a suitable person was found, both families entered negotiations to decide which family would provide for the couple. Once the agreement was made the woman brought a dowry to her new husband’s family.

Marriage was looked at as a contract and some suggest that the giving of engagement rings in ancient Rome may have been used to signal that a contract had been made between the couple and their families. So while many practice some parts of these traditions it is easy to see why other parts have been left along the path of history.

 ***

Some links in this post are affiliate links. We are a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for us to earn fees by linking to amazon.com and affiliate sites.

Thanks so much for being part of our success.
 
 Photo credits: wikimedia, wikimedia, Amazon